{"id":6880,"date":"2019-02-05T23:14:14","date_gmt":"2019-02-05T23:14:14","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/?p=6880"},"modified":"2021-03-03T23:42:23","modified_gmt":"2021-03-03T15:42:23","slug":"004-how-to-handle-stress-like-a-boss-babe-david-trotter","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/?p=6880","title":{"rendered":"004: How to Handle Stress Like a Boss (Babe) &#8211; David Trotter"},"content":{"rendered":"\r\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/embed.radiopublic.com\/e?if=inspiration-rising-WY5X55&amp;ge=s1!baf13bd9baad5b2bce96bcc5b0f90f611a04ee64\" width=\"100%\" height=\"185\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" sandbox=\"allow-same-origin allow-scripts allow-top-navigation allow-popups\"><\/iframe><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Welcome to the Inpiration Rising podcast!<\/strong>\u00a0My name is\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.insporising.com\/about\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\" (opens in a new tab)\">J. David Trotter<\/a>, and I\u2019m here to help you get unstuck, clarify your goals, and launch yourself today.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I used to love stress! I would create scenarios where I would feel stressed to experience that hit of adrenaline that would make me feel alive and motivate me to get all sorts of stuff done. I was stressed out from 1998 to 2008. I was a workaholic, and I thrived on stress. The major downside was&#8230;stress didn\u2019t help my relationships or my soul. It made me short, impatient, and critical (more than usual I should say), and it caused a constant buzz in my mind and heart.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">11 years ago after a major meltdown, peace became a major value for me, so I actively seek to cultivate, and that\u2019s what I want to share with you today.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Here are four questions to ask yourself if you want to handle stress like a boss babe&#8230;<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>1. What\u2019s causing me stress?<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Have you ever had moments in life when you\u2019re frazzled, and you\u2019re not even sure why? I definitely have, and I will literally stop and ask myself, \u201cWhat am I stressed about?\u201d Why do I have this buzz inside me?<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I will close my eyes and follow the sound of the buzz until it gets louder and louder. Sometimes, it shows up right away. I\u2019ll think to myself, \u201cOh yeah, I just got that bill in the mail, and I\u2019m stressed about the money disappearing from my account. Or, I just saw my kid\u2019s grades, and I\u2019ve gotta have that conversation after school.\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Or, in some situations, it doesn\u2019t show up right away, and I have to follow the buzz a bit longer. I start going through the list of major things in my life until I find out where the stress is coming from. Money, my kids, my wife, clients, health?<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>2. What am I afraid of?<br \/><\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">For me, stress is a signal that I\u2019m afraid of something negative happening. My fear is that I won\u2019t have enough money to pay the bills. My fear is that having a conversation, because I don\u2019t want the person to be disappointed. I\u2019m afraid of not having enough time to get all my work done. I\u2019m worried that driving the kids around to all these activities is going to consume me, and I\u2019ll never get off this treadmill.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Been there?<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Oftentimes, I\u2019m just really stressed, because I\u2019m thinking of a worst-case scenario around whatever situation I\u2019m faced with. By being honest about it, it moves the stress and associated fear out of the nebulous darkness and brings it into the light.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I am afraid of\u2026<br \/>My fear is\u2026<br \/>I\u2019m worried about\u2026<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Just by stating what the fear or worse-case scenario is out loud&#8230;some of the power gets taken away. We\u2019ve asked&#8230;what\u2019s causing me stress? What am I afraid of?<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>3. What can I do about it?<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I tell my kids all the time, \u201cThere\u2019s always a solution.\u201d It\u2019s figureoutable as Marie Forleo says. A solution-based mindset focuses on possibilities, and possibilities reduce pain. When I feel stuck and overwhelmed, it can be easy for me to be blind to creative solutions. \u201cThis is how life will be forever, and I might as well crawl under the covers and die.\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Finding a solution doesn\u2019t mean the challenging situation is going to go away, but it means that there are steps you can take to bring about a positive change. When we\u2019re stuck, it can be hard to see creative options, and it may take reaching out to a friend to ask for a different perspective.\u201cI\u2019m not sure how to deal with this financial situation, health challenge, relationship issue&#8230;what creative next step am I not seeing?\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It\u2019s easy to say, \u201cI\u2019ve tried everything, and nothing will make this situation better.\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Don\u2019t give in to that way of thinking. You can do something, and you just need to be creative in the way that you\u2019re approaching it.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\r\n<li><strong>Financial<\/strong>\u00a0&#8211; decrease spending, ask for a raise, buy stuff at a yard sale, and re-sell it.<\/li>\r\n<li><strong>Health<\/strong>\u00a0&#8211; another doctor\u2019s opinion, alternative medicine, new ways of eating or exercising.<\/li>\r\n<li><strong>Relationship<\/strong>\u00a0&#8211; new ways of communicating, empathy, forgiveness, counseling.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I don\u2019t know exactly what\u2019s causing you stress, but I do know that you can do something. Ask a friend for their perspective, and get creative.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>4. What do I need to release?<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I\u2019m sure you\u2019ve heard the Serenity Prayer somewhere. It\u2019s often said in 12 step groups, and it\u2019s extremely powerful. If you know it, say it with me now.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>God, grant me the serenity<\/em><br \/><em>to accept the things I cannot change,<\/em><br \/><em>the courage to change the things I can,<\/em><br \/><em>and the wisdom to know the difference.<\/em><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There are some things that you can\u2019t change.You can\u2019t change someone else\u2019s opinions or behavior. But, you can change yours.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You can\u2019t control your child\u2019s reaction. But, you can control your own.<br \/>You can\u2019t add more time to your day. But, you can figure out how to manage yours.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">To release something means that I accept that I can\u2019t change it, and I\u2019m asking God to give me serenity or peace as I do that.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">As we\u2019ve been chatting it up here, my guess is that you\u2019ve already been thinking about a stressful situation in your own life. I want you to know that I believe you are courageous enough to admit what you\u2019re afraid of, and I know that you\u2019re strong enough to figure out what you can do about it. Once you\u2019ve determined what\u2019s possible for you to do, write it down on your to-do list so you can start making it happen.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Now, I want us to end our time together with a moment of release.<\/strong>\u00a0There are some things that you and I can\u2019t change and releasing that unrealistic expectation will help tremendously. If you\u2019re not driving, feel free to close your eyes and join me in this moment\u2026<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>I recognize that I cannot change other people or control their reactions.<\/em><br \/><em>I can only choose my own thoughts, attitudes, and behaviors.<\/em><br \/><em>I am releasing control and accepting the things I cannot change.<\/em><br \/><em>God, I trust you with the outcomes. Please give me peace.<\/em><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I hope you\u2019re feeling a bit better, and I want to encourage you to ask these four questions whenever you\u2019re feeling the stress.<\/p>\r\n<p><strong>Create beautiful, engaging social media in 5 minutes a day &#8211;<\/strong>\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.riseupcreatives.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">www.RiseUpCreatives.com<\/a><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\" \/>\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Subscribe to Inspiration Rising <\/strong>on <a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/inspiration-rising\/id1448649388\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">iTunes<\/a>,\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/42zIsXzjCibZt49xdCRvB4\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Spotify<\/a>,\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.stitcher.com\/podcast\/in-plain-sight\/launch-yourself-today\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Stitcher<\/a>, or\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/play.google.com\/music\/m\/Iqrp5q3bagph2t23malprd3dxvy?t=Launch_Yourself_Today\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Google Music<\/a>.<\/p>\r\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Welcome to the Inpiration Rising podcast!\u00a0My name is\u00a0J. David Trotter, and I\u2019m here to help you get unstuck, clarify your goals, and launch yourself today. I used to love stress! I would create scenarios where I would feel stressed to experience that hit of adrenaline that would make me feel alive and motivate me to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6916,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6880","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-general"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6880","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6880"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6880\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/6916"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6880"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6880"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6880"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}