{"id":7092,"date":"2019-07-17T06:00:03","date_gmt":"2019-07-17T06:00:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/copy-of-049-now-is-the-time-what-are-you-waiting-for-david-trotter\/"},"modified":"2021-03-03T23:16:09","modified_gmt":"2021-03-03T15:16:09","slug":"049-how-to-stop-feeling-like-sht-andrea-owen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/?p=7092","title":{"rendered":"050: How to Stop Feeling Like Sh*t &#8211; Andrea Owen"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/embed.radiopublic.com\/e?if=inspiration-rising-WY5X55&amp;ge=s1!5fc3e0e8049fbabfdebe53e938cfb1157bfff2d9\" width=\"100%\" height=\"185\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" sandbox=\"allow-same-origin allow-scripts allow-top-navigation allow-popups\"><\/iframe><\/p>\r\n<p><strong>Andrea Owen<\/strong> is an author, mentor, and professional certified life coach who helps high-achieving women let go of perfectionism, control, and isolation and choosing courage and confidence instead. She has helped thousands of women manage their inner-critic to create loving connections and live their most kick-ass life. She is the proud author of <a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/2Svjy0h\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">How To Stop Feeling Like Sh*t: 14 Habits That Are Holding You Back From Happiness<\/a>, which has been translated into 18 languages, as well as her inaugural book, <a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/2Y3jmdN\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">52 Ways to Live a Kick-Ass Life: BS Free Wisdom to Ignite Your Inner Badass and Live the Life You Deserve<\/a>. When she\u2019s not juggling her full coaching practice or hosting retreats, Andrea is busy riding her Peloton bike, chasing her 11-year-old son and 9-year-old daughter or making out with her husband, Jason. She is also a retired roller derby player having skated under the name \u201cVeronica Vain\u201d.<\/p>\r\n<p><b>In This Episode, You Will Learn:<\/b><\/p>\r\n<ul>\r\n<li>Three sources of your inner critic.<\/li>\r\n<li>How to recognize your inner critic and cultivate positive thinking.<\/li>\r\n<li>Andrea&#8217;s story of hitting rock bottom and coming back.<\/li>\r\n<li>How Andrea told her Lutheran pastor that she believes in reincarnation.<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<p><strong>Create beautiful, engaging social media in 5 minutes a day &#8211;<\/strong>\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.riseupcreatives.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">www.RiseUpCreatives.com<\/a><\/p>\r\n<p><strong>Connect with Andrea Owen:<\/strong><\/p>\r\n<ul>\r\n<li><a href=\"http:\/\/yourkickasslife.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">YourKickAssLife.com<\/a><\/li>\r\n<li><a href=\"http:\/\/yourkickasslife.com\/category\/podcast\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Your Kick Ass Life Podcast<\/a><\/li>\r\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/pg\/yourkickasslife\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Facebook<\/a><\/li>\r\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/yourkickasslife\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Instagram<\/a><\/li>\r\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/andrea_owen\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Twitter<\/a><\/li>\r\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/user\/YourKickAssLife\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">YouTube<\/a><\/li>\r\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.pinterest.com\/yourkickasslife\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Pinterest<\/a><\/li>\r\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/yourkickasslife\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">LinkedIn<\/a><\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<p><strong>Don\u2019t Miss A Single Episode:<\/strong><\/p>\r\n<ul>\r\n<li><strong>Subscribe<\/strong>\u00a0on\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/inspiration-rising\/id1448649388\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" aria-label=\" (opens in a new tab)\">Apple Podcasts<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/play.google.com\/music\/m\/Iqrp5q3bagph2t23malprd3dxvy?t=Launch_Yourself_Today\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Google Podcasts<\/a>,\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/42zIsXzjCibZt49xdCRvB4\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Spotify<\/a>, or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.stitcher.com\/podcast\/in-plain-sight\/launch-yourself-today\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Stitcher<\/a>.<\/li>\r\n<li><strong>Leave a quick review<\/strong>\u00a0on any of the podcast apps to tell people what you think about the show.<\/li>\r\n<li><strong>Take a screenshot of the podcast<\/strong> and post it on Instagram or Instagram Stories. Tag us <a href=\"http:\/\/www.instagram.com\/insporising\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">@insporising<\/a>. We\u2019ll repost and give you a shoutout!<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n<p><!-- \/wp:post-content -->\r\n\r\n<!-- wp:spacer {\"height\":31} --><\/p>\r\n<div class=\"wp-block-spacer\" style=\"height: 31px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\">\u00a0<\/div>\r\n<p><!-- \/wp:spacer -->\r\n\r\n<!-- wp:separator --><\/p>\r\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\" \/>\r\n<p><!-- \/wp:separator -->\r\n\r\n<!-- wp:spacer {\"height\":35} --><\/p>\r\n<div class=\"wp-block-spacer\" style=\"height: 35px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\">\u00a0<\/div>\r\n<p><!-- \/wp:spacer -->\r\n\r\n<!-- wp:heading {\"level\":1,\"align\":\"center\"} --><\/p>\r\n<h1 style=\"text-align: center;\">Interview Transcript<\/h1>\r\n<p><!-- \/wp:heading -->\r\n\r\n<!-- wp:paragraph --><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Well, Andrea, thank you so much for taking time to hang with me today.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">I\u2019m so excited to have this conversation, David. Thanks for having me.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Sure. I just mentioned to you before we started that we\u2019re probably at episode fifty with no cursing, so you are going to ruin our streak.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">I\u2019m so honored to be the maiden voyage into this &#8211; into the foul language.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>It\u2019s all good. Today we\u2019re talking about our inner critic. And so, first thing I want to know is why should it even matter how we talk to ourselves?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Right. Well, it\u2019s one of those things where people ask me &#8211; also the question -. This is how strongly I feel about it. People ask me, \u201cIf you could only give people one tool or exercise, where should they start?\u201d And I always say, \u201cYou need to start with the conversation that you\u2019re having with yourself.\u201d Because that &#8211; you wouldn\u2019t let other people talk to you the way that your inner critic talks to you. And not just that, our inner critic is directly related to our core belief systems; the things that we truly are committed to believing about ourselves. So, if you are beating yourself up 24\/7, chances are you have a core belief that says, \u201cI\u2019m not good enough. I always am a failure. I am a screwup. I\u2019ll never be -,\u201d fill in the blank. And so, that carries us and we start making our decisions from that place about who we &#8211; who are relationships are, what we will tolerate in our lives. And so, you can kind of see the chain of events that it can unleash when we aren\u2019t speaking to ourselves kindly.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>So, where does this even start with? Because I think &#8211; well, a lot of us don\u2019t even realize we have it, because it\u2019s such a good friend. But where does this inner critic even begin? At what point in our life?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">It can start for many &#8211; sadly, it can start really young. It depends on your family of origin. Maybe there were some things that were said to you outright. That you are a failure. That you\u2019ll never measure up to anything. That type of thing. And also, in some families it\u2019s not clearly said but the messaging definitely is there. Maybe we had a sibling that was always \u201cthe smart one\u201d and we were never praised for anything. So, then we start to &#8211; we make assumptions about how our parents and our caregivers feel about us and how they see us. And that\u2019s just a human trait that our brains do. It can also come from relationships that we\u2019ve had before. People say things to us, people &#8211; even just their actions make us make up stories about ourselves. And it also comes from our culture. I\u2019m going to gender stereotype here for a second, David. So, for men, their inner critic\u2026<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Feel free.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Okay. I don\u2019t like to but I\u2019m going to. For me, typically the inner critic is around being vulnerable as weak. That your status, how much money you make, how successful you are is directly equivalent to how good of a person you are.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>How about the size of your penis?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">That might matter. I mean, I don\u2019t know. I don\u2019t have the experience of walking around with one.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>You know how many jokes\u2026?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">I think you\u2019re half joking there, right?<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>No. No, I\u2019m not even saying the actual &#8211; I\u2019m just saying the amount of jokes that are about that. <\/b><b>I think that\u2019s like a metaphor for exactly what you\u2019re saying; any type of performance. You know what I mean? All about performance.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">It\u2019s directly related to your masculinity. Absolutely, and for women it just looks different. Our bodies, the way that they look, the size that they are, the appearance of our face, how old we are, that matters culturally in terms of how valued we are. I hate that it\u2019s like that. I hate it. But it is.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>It is, yeah. <\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">It sucks.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>That is pretty common, yeah. Okay, so I\u2019m hearing you say our family of origin.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>And culture. Those are two big ones.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">And relationships.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>And relationships are where those &#8211; the inner critic comes from.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah, and I think this is worth mentioning. As humans, brain science shows us that we have a negativity bias. We are more likely to jump to -. It\u2019s sort of like when you get a review at work, this is an easy example for people, and there is all the great things that they\u2019re saying about you and then there\u2019s like the opportunity for improvement. That\u2019s the one that we latch onto and we obsess on. And we\u2019re complaining, \u201cOh, my boss is such a dick. He said this about me.\u201d Or we don\u2019t tell anyone because we\u2019re so ashamed about this opportunity for improvement that we got on our yearly review. That\u2019s a negativity bias.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Are you familiar with &#8211; and the two &#8211; the names of the two books are escaping me at the moment, but Michael Singer\u2019s books? Are you familiar with him?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yes, I\u2019m familiar with the author but I probably haven\u2019t read the book.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Okay. Man, I cannot believe those two books have escaped my thought.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">It\u2019s positive psychology, isn\u2019t it? The topic?<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Well, he\u2019s all about basically saying that you\u2019re &#8211; that inner voice &#8211; any inner voice is not you. We somehow &#8211; and really he resonates with that term \u201cinner critic\u201d, in saying that we think that that voice that we\u2019re hearing is us and he basically just says, \u201cHow do you disconnect from that? How do you see it from a distance? How do you observe it? And then you\u2019re disconnecting yourself from it.\u201d Because I know for me, that inner critic is so familiar that it\u2019s like, \u201cNo, that is me. That is me telling me that.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Totally. I remember when I was sitting in my alma matter for &#8211; my life coaching certification is the Coach\u2019s Training Institute, and I remember the very first weekend that we were in training. Sitting in that conference room in Los Angeles and they started talking about it. The Coach\u2019s Training Institute calls it \u201cyour saboteur\u201d, which I think is kind of hilarious. Like, let\u2019s slap a French word on it and make it sound sexier. It\u2019s not. But I remember looking around at everybody in the room like, \u201cWait, wait, wait. You mean to tell me that voice that I hear that tells me I shouldn\u2019t even start because it\u2019s going to -. Or, what are people going to think? All of these excuses, negative self-talk, like that isn\u2019t my truth? You mean I have the ability to manage that and change the way that I talk to myself?\u201d Like, to me, head explosions. The possibility are endless for this. So, I agree to that &#8211; to what that author is saying and at the same time, like I was saying in the beginning of our conversation, the self-talk matters but also the real kicker is that our self-talk becomes our core beliefs and it lives in our bodies and that can be the messier part to untangle and unlearn and detach from.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>It\u2019s almost like these are the tip of the iceberg &#8211; the symptom. The inner critic is. It\u2019s revealing what\u2019s going on below the surface. So, how do we recognize this voice? Because if we become so familiar with it, I know a lot of people that I talk to and coach, it\u2019s like, \u201cWhat do you mean? That\u2019s just the truth. I do suck.\u201d How do you distinguish what is the inner critic and what is reality?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Well, I mean, with that example, I would love to dig in with that person. Every person is nuanced but I\u2019d be interested to know what happened to that person. What stories they make up about themselves because of the way someone spoke to them or because of some circumstances that happened that makes them so committed to that belief. And it\u2019s heartbreaking. Everyone has a story and there are some people whose stories would bring you to your knees and there\u2019s some shame in many people\u2019s stories. They don\u2019t want to reveal what was said to them or how they came about believing that. But after we sort of untangle that, where I would start with someone is just to challenge those beliefs. What is the evidence that you have that you are a bad person? Does making a mistake equal being a bad person? If David had made those same quote unquote \u201cmistakes\u201d or lived that same life, would you think he was a bad person? So, I would sort of show them the reality of it and that\u2019s not a quick fix. I\u2019m not saying it is, but that\u2019s a place where I would start. Just really looking at it at face value of what\u2019s really going on.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>If I have any negative thought about myself, would you say that that is an inner critic? Any negative thought? You know what I mean? How would I distinguish what\u2019s going on in my head and what I should call a negative thought or what I should call an inner critic, versus just, \u201cYeah, that really is the case.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah, that\u2019s a great question and no, not every negative thought is the inner critic because sometimes we are assholes, right? Sometimes I show up and I\u2019m not the best mom to my kids and I lash out and I have to circle back and apologize to them. So, I think that &#8211; are you familiar with the work of Byron Katie?<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">So, she has what she calls \u201cThe Work\u201d, which I think is so awesome that she has coined that; capital T, capital W. And she asks four questions. I have a little bit &#8211; I don\u2019t love the very end because sometimes when you\u2019re taking -. Anyway, long story short, she asks you to look at your part in things, which I think is super important about taking responsibility. However, sometimes people can blame themselves unnecessarily. But the first couple of questions that she asks is simply, \u201cIs this true?\u201d And so, there\u2019s a difference between &#8211; so, say I lash out at my kids unnecessarily. There\u2019s a difference between me saying, \u201cWow, that was a mistake. I should not have spoken to that kid that way. He didn\u2019t deserve that.\u201d That\u2019s one thing. On the other hand, me saying to myself, \u201cI\u2019m the world\u2019s worst mother. This kid deserves a completely different mother. How can I even look at myself in the mirror? What a terrible human being I am,\u201d which I\u2019ve had those thoughts as well. So, there\u2019s a difference and Brene Brown, who\u2019s studied shame work extensively, those differences are shame versus guilt. So, shame is, \u201cI am a bad person,\u201d and guilt is, \u201cI made a mistake,\u201d and those are two very, very different things. Which we can go down that path if you want to, but that\u2019s really a little bit of a deeper level around this topic.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>So, that almost sounds like a behavior versus identity. Would that be the case?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Exactly, yes. Behavior versus identity is perfect.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Yeah, so my behavior was poor or unhelpful in that moment, versus I am this in my totality.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Exactly, and it\u2019s noticing when you\u2019re thinking in absolutes like that. So many of us do it. It\u2019s so very normal and the trick is to catch yourself in the moment. It\u2019s not necessarily &#8211; I think when people walk into their path of personal development, I don\u2019t know if this was the case for you, but being a high achiever and I tend to be black or white about things. Either I am someone who talks badly to myself and has a lot of negative self-talk, or I am in constant positive affirmation mode and, \u201cNo, I am a good person at all times.\u201d And what has been so helpful to me, is to realize that\u2019s actually not the case. Like, it\u2019s part of the human experience to sort of be on this rollercoaster of emotions and beliefs and things like that. What I always tell people is, the win is that you\u2019re catching yourself in the moment. In the moment of telling yourself that you\u2019re a bad person. So that you can move on. And sometimes it\u2019s just bypassing it and saying, \u201cNope, I\u2019m not going to believe that,\u201d and going and apologizing and making amends. I don\u2019t sit at my desk and catch myself in those moments and do ten minutes of positive affirmations. I don\u2019t. I don\u2019t have time for that first of all. But it\u2019s about noticing when you\u2019re beating yourself up and choosing a different direction to go.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Okay, so when you say notice it and choose a different direction to go, how do I choose a different direction to go? What are some strategies that I can use?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">One of my favorites is, I have a mantra that I say to myself. And so, what it\u2019s essentially doing is &#8211; another thing we know from brain science is that we create neuro pathways in our brains. Our brains are very malleable and that\u2019s why we\u2019re so quick to think about certain things, because those pathways have been created. We\u2019re also extremely habitual. We think &#8211; most of our thoughts are the same thoughts that we had the day before and the day before and the day before, and a lot of those are negative. The vast majority of them are negative. So, what you\u2019re trying to do is create a pattern interrupter. And so, you\u2019re not necessarily trying to flip the switch and think a completely different thought, you\u2019re catching yourself in the moment. And so, anyone who\u2019s listening to this podcast, you\u2019re probably pretty aware of when you go down that path or completely beating yourself up. It might take you a few minutes. It might even take you a couple of hours, but eventually you will notice. And my suggestion is to have some kind of mantra that you tell yourself that is neutral. So, the one that I use is, \u201cWell, that just happened.\u201d That\u2019s all I say.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">So, it\u2019s not positive. It\u2019s not negative. I\u2019m not telling my inner critic to piss off, which I don\u2019t think is helpful personally. I\u2019m not telling myself a positive affirmation. I\u2019m acknowledging that it happened and then I\u2019m choosing another thought after that and a lot of times, I change what I\u2019m doing in that moment. So, again, you\u2019re trying to create a pattern interrupter, so that you can recognize that negative self-thought train more quickly next time.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Okay, so, \u201cWell, that just happened.\u201d Alright.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">You can do &#8211; I have some clients who love the mantra &#8211; they just say, \u201cStop,\u201d and they imagine a red stop sign. I have some clients who say, \u201cThank you for sharing.\u201d Mantras are short and powerful and again, I highly encourage you to make it neutral and that you\u2019re just acknowledging what happened and you\u2019re not making it mean anything.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Okay, and then after that &#8211; after you\u2019ve interrupted the pattern, choosing a different thought. How do I choose that thought? What do I choose to think?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">It might be that you -. I think that\u2019s why it\u2019s sometimes helpful to change geography, and what I mean by that is change what you\u2019re doing in that moment. If you\u2019re sitting -. Sometimes an example that I give is one time I was sitting in the car and I had just walked away from an IEP meeting. My son has special needs and\u2026<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Oh, I know what those are. My wife\u2019s a kindergarten teacher. A lot of IEP talk in our house.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Those are &#8211; and my hat\u2019s off to the teachers that have to deal with parents and administrators and all the paperwork involved in that. But as a parent, it depends on the meeting but you can walk away from those meetings feeling like you got the emotional shit kicked out of you. And this particular meeting, I did.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">And I walked away and I was in the car and I\u2019m going down that path of just feeling &#8211; blaming myself completely for everything that really wasn\u2019t my fault. Feeling like I\u2019m not doing enough as a mom. I haven\u2019t done one of those autism 5K\u2019s. I don\u2019t even have the blue puzzle sticker on my car, \u201cWhat kind of mother am I?\u201d And I was sitting at a red light when this was happening and &#8211; I mean, we\u2019re not at red lights for very long, even though it can feel like a long time, but as the light turned green, it sort of shook me out of that thought trap that I was in and I said my mantra. I said, \u201cWell, that just happened,\u201d and my next thought was, \u201cAnd I\u2019m doing the best I can.\u201d So, at that point, this was maybe in 2013ish, I had been doing this work for several years and so for me to say to myself, \u201cI\u2019m doing the best I can,\u201d I did in that moment truly believe that. The me five years before that might not have believed it, so I wouldn\u2019t have said it. So, it would have been enough just for me to say, \u201cWell, that just happened,\u201d and then start driving again and think about something else. Maybe it was, \u201cOkay, well, what can I do in this situation? I can reach out to such and such organization for help,\u201d or it is going through what I need to get at the grocery store. It can be innocuous; it doesn\u2019t have to be related to the thing that you were beating yourself up for.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Even if you have to do it five to ten times within a minute, because that\u2019s what people push back on me too. They\u2019re like, \u201cWell, I tried that and it didn\u2019t work.\u201d And my argument is, \u201cYou have been thinking the same way for like thirty, forty, fifty years. This is going to take a minute for you to get in the practice of changing the way that your thought patterns are.\u201d You have got to commit to this and you have got to have patience and perseverance in this work, because this has the ability to change your life.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>It feels like exercise, Andrea. And I don\u2019t want to exercise. It feels hard.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Right, okay. Well, then what\u2019s the alternative? That you feel like shit. I don\u2019t know what else to tell you. I look at it as hygiene. Do I want to floss my teeth every night? Not particularly, but I\u2019m forty-four years old and if I don\u2019t take care of my gums, my teeth are going to fall out or I\u2019m going to be bleeding when I\u2019m talking to people and that\u2019s just gross. I don\u2019t want that. So, I would rather floss then have the alternative. So, that\u2019s what I ask people, \u201cWhat\u2019s the alternative? Because it\u2019s not working for you to have this consistent negative self-talk.\u201d I get fired up about this.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Yeah, I feel it. Woo, man. All of a sudden I\u2019ve got bloody gums and I\u2019m feeling bad about myself and I\u2019ve got an autistic son and I\u2019m like, \u201cOh, my God. I\u2019ve got a lot of problems.\u201d It breaks my heart when I interact with people who have the negative self-talk &#8211; the inner critic, and their life shows it. The results that they\u2019re getting shows it. And they\u2019re not interested or willing to do the work. It kills me. It kills me. It\u2019s lost potential. We have one life; you\u2019re losing every day of your life that you\u2019re just lying in bed watching TV. You\u2019re losing the potential that you have to make a positive impact in the world. It just kills me. It absolutely kills me.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">It does, but here\u2019s what I think and I\u2019m going to get real woo-woo on you for a minute here. I think that not every person on this Earth was meant to live their fullest potential. I think that\u2026<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>That is depressing.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Isn\u2019t it? I know. I just &#8211; I think it\u2019s not up to everyone. I think that maybe in a different &#8211; whatever you believe about souls and spirits and things like that, but it\u2019s not for this lifetime. It\u2019s just not and I know how painful it is, especially when we see someone that we love and care about and we know this book that\u2019s going to help them so much. And we see them, either they\u2019re financially a mess or their relationships are a mess or everything &#8211; or they have bleeding gums or whatever. But it\u2019s not up to us to change them and it\u2019s -. I get it, it is so heartbreaking but I find some comfort in knowing that it\u2019s just not their lifetime. And in another lifetime, I truly believe that they will be different and they will live up to their potential and unfortunately, I\u2019m just not going to be around to see it.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Do you think that we reincarnate? Is that what you\u2019re saying?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">I do to some extent. You know, it\u2019s funny, I grew up Lutheran and I remember I was probably eleven or twelve and I went\u2026<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>I don\u2019t think Lutheran\u2019s believe that.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">They don\u2019t and I found out because I told my pastor who was this man that I trusted. I think at the time we were going through confirmation, so I must have been in seventh grade and he was my spiritual mentor. I remember sitting in his office and I was so excited because I was going to tell him, because I knew in my bones that my body has walked this Earth in -. I couldn\u2019t tell you who it was, but I just knew I had been here before. And I believed it and I told him that and he says, \u201cOh, Andrea, we don\u2019t believe in reincarnation,\u201d and I was like, \u201cWe don\u2019t?\u201d But I believed this and it was worse than finding out there was no Santa. I mean, it was heartbreaking and I remember being so disappointed it and feeling wrong and that was just like, \u201cDon\u2019t trust your intuition anymore because it\u2019s wrong.\u201d<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>And, \u201cWe don\u2019t believe that, so now you\u2019re not one of us.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">\u201cYou\u2019re not one of us.\u201d And nobody wants that feeling.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Did you go home and tell your parents?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Probably not, but my mom has always been -. What\u2019s funny is my mom grew up very Catholic, as did my dad. But my mom as always been &#8211; I mean, she\u2019s a witch. We know she\u2019s a witch, me and my sister. That\u2019s just another conversation. But they don\u2019t &#8211; they kind of frown upon that and the Catholic church. And Lutheran is just Catholic light, let\u2019s be honest. But no, she &#8211; my mom was open to it but no, I don\u2019t think we ever had the conversation.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Okay. If you could choose any one that you would have had a former &#8211; like, you would have been them in a former life, who would you choose?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">What do you mean I would have been them?<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Like you were them. Like let\u2019s just say you knew you were this person in a former life\u2026<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Oh, yeah.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Who would you choose?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">My guess is that it\u2019s someone who struggled profoundly, because I also think that we sort of graduate into the next evolution with each life that we live. And to me, there\u2019s a saying in the spirituality world that when we choose this path of personal development, of becoming a conscious evolved person, we have the opportunity to heal the seven generations before us and the seven generations after us. Which is like, no pressure but I also think that because the gifts that I have been given, my life exploded in 2006, which has brought me here. And to be able to walk away from that and not be a full-on drug addict and just throw my life away, to be able to become as conscious as I have, and I still have a long way to go &#8211; to be able to face my own shit and have some hard conversations and take radical responsibility and accountability for my mistakes, I had to have had some struggle before. You don\u2019t just get this amount of privilege and amazing life, having had it easy. That\u2019s just my &#8211; what I believe.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Sure, I must have lived a hard life too. So, now I read about 2006 in your book. But for people who &#8211; and this was not part of my planned conversation with you, but now that you\u2019ve brought it up and I think it would be really powerful for people to know that part of your story, even just briefly. Because it sets the context for the conversation that we\u2019re having about your inner critic. It really is like, \u201cOkay, yeah. You didn\u2019t just grow up in a nice Lutheran family and happen to believe in reincarnation and now you have an inner critic.\u201d Yeah, yeah, yeah. It\u2019s like, \u201cWell, yeah, okay that was a nice life.\u201d How did rock bottom &#8211; how did you find rock bottom in 2006?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah, well I was married before. I met a nice boy when I was seventeen and ten years later, we got married. And we had been together &#8211; we had been married for a couple of years and we always knew we wanted a family and we\u2019re talking about conceiving our first child. And he also had a really large family. My parents got divorced when I was eighteen, so they basically adopted me and they were the type of family who &#8211; any celebration and birthdays, baby showers, graduations, job promotions, anything. I mean, you coughed really loud and they were like, \u201cYes! You\u2019re amazing! Let\u2019s all get together and have dinner and drink and just congratulate each other.\u201d They just loved really, really hard. And so, I was &#8211; thirteen years, they were my family. They were definitely my family and they were a big family too. And my husband at the time, decided to have an affair with our neighbor who lived across the street and got her pregnant. It was not a matter of, \u201cOh, my gosh, Andrea. I made this mistake. Can you forgive me for this? Let\u2019s try to work it out.\u201d Which to be honest with you, David. I probably would have tried to figure out a way to make it work because I was so attached to his family, and that wasn\u2019t the case. He was in love with this other woman. They got a house together. They even got a dog together. It was just so awful. So, I was essentially &#8211; I mean, you talk about pushed out of a community, they had no choice. I had to leave and this other woman essentially took my place. So, I did what I probably should not have done right after that. I started dating. I met someone whom I thought was Mr. Right and to make a nine month story short, he had lied about everything. He had conned me out of almost ten thousand dollars. He was addicted to opioids and I didn\u2019t know it because he had lied about having cancer to cover up his drug problem. So, I was financially supporting his quote unquote \u201ccancer medication\u201d, which was basically opioids that we were getting in Tijuana, Mexico because we lived in San Diego. And I was unknowingly crossing the border with illegal drugs for him. I\u2019m going to write a memoire, because the whole story is just like, \u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>\u201cThat happened.\u201d \u201cThat just happened.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">That happened. And so, he went away to rehab. I confronted him with everything. He admitted everything. He went away to rehab and I was pregnant with his child. And I thought, \u201cMaybe he can get sober and we can work this out.\u201d If I hadn\u2019t been pregnant, I would have not but some people get sober and clean their lives up and live happily ever after. It happens in Lifetime movies. So, he went to rehab and he met someone else who was another addict and he fell in love with her and we broke up. And she had a trust fund by the way. We all know how that ends. So, I have an eleven year old son from him and I was pregnant and on the floor in my bedroom after having found out that he was cheating on me with this woman in rehab and thinking, \u201cHow did I get here?\u201d I was thirty-one at the time, so it was also right around the time where most if not all of my friends were getting married and or having babies and it was just &#8211; the shame I felt for where I had ended up and the choices I had made. And of course, those two guys had done crappy things to me but I had to look around at what I had tolerated. I had major issues with control and co-dependence and really equated my self-worth and how valuable I was as a human based on my romantic relationships. And I had to take a good hard look at that and just really start &#8211; I know it sounds clich\u00e9, but I had to start over and that\u2019s really where everything took off because I got to really get to know myself, if that makes any sense, and just start living from a conscious place. It sucked; I\u2019m not going to say it didn\u2019t. It was hard. And that was twelve years ago? Yeah, thirteen years ago.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>That\u2019s an extremely painful journey.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">It sucked. I got the shit kicked out of me, mentally and emotionally. But looking back on it, I am so grateful that that happened because I didn\u2019t belong in that family. He was doing the best that he could but he had clipped my wings and I was always just &#8211; I always felt like I was too loud and too expressive and all of these things. At the end of the day, I think my first husband had a real problem with me being as strong and powerful as I was. And so, I felt wrong for it, and angry. I realized also how angry I was, and for women especially, we have complicated relationships with anger and rage. And when I got out of both of those relationships, I mean, it all came flying out. I also finally learned how to feel my feelings and that none of them were wrong.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>And now, twelve years later, through all that pain you\u2019re helping so many people process who they are and help them to feel better about their lives and gain traction in their lives. It\u2019s so powerful. So powerful.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah, and I\u2019m not -. Thank you for that. I appreciate it. And I\u2019m not here to tell you that there was an end to that and that, \u201cOh, I made it.\u201d In terms of success, I do feel like I\u2019ve made it and there\u2019s more. That type &#8211; if you\u2019re going to define it that way. But in terms of my own personal development journey, I\u2019m still uncovering stuff that\u2019s old patterns and behaviors and now I get -. This might be kind of sick, but I get excited when I uncover something where I need to work on that and I look forward to the journey, even though sometimes it\u2019s a slug fest. It\u2019s still &#8211; I have tasted how it feels to be alive and I remember how much pain I was in before and how unconscious I was before and I honor that woman. Because before I had a lot of resentment towards her, but I\u2019ve worked through it. I got some coaching on it, as we do. And I\u2019m excited for what\u2019s to come.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>So powerful. Alright, back to &#8211; thank you for the detour. Very powerful detour. Twelve year detour. Inner critic. What if I say, \u201cI need this inner critic to motivate me, because this negative voice is what pushes me to the next level. Challenges me to be better. Do better. Work harder\u201d? What if I get rid of that negative critic? If I get rid of the inner critic, will I lose my edge in life?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">My short answer is, no. And I invite people who have that belief to think about, are you thinking in black or white again? So, for those people it tends to be, \u201cEither I have this inner critic that kicks my butt and motivates me, or I am a complete slacker that throws in the towel and then we know what happens then. Then I become a loser and I\u2019m not successful, etcetera, etcetera.\u201d And I get it. I totally understand, and at the same time, no one beats themselves up into betterment. We don\u2019t get better and evolve through the shit being beat out of us. It just &#8211; it doesn\u2019t happen that way. The way &#8211; the journey to your best self, your most evolved self, your most successful self, truly is through kindness and self-compassion. And I know that might be contradictory, maybe even more so to men, but just &#8211; I invite you just to try it. Just try it for a little while. And it doesn\u2019t mean that you &#8211; I think that people think if they are kind and compassionate to themselves, it means, \u201cOh, I don\u2019t have to get up for these five AM workouts that I do enjoy. I\u2019m just going to sleep in.\u201d It just is treating yourself like you would your very best friend or maybe even your dog. Would you beat your dog up? I hope you don\u2019t, because if you do, I don\u2019t want to be your friend. But no, it\u2019s through kindness and dog treats and high pitched voices and things like that. It\u2019s that avenue of kindness and compassion that we offer our closest people that we love and even to our pets. Try that on for a minute and see how it works for you. I think a lot of people listening might not even know what that looks like.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Well, I want them to get your latest book for sure. I\u2019ve been reading through it. It\u2019s <i>How to Stop Feeling Like Shit<\/i> and that\u2019s the first time that I\u2019ve cussed on the podcast, oh my gosh. I hope my mom\u2019s not listening. I\u2019m such a loser. <\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">I\u2019m so honored to share this moment with you, David.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>I\u2019m the worst person ever. Okay, that just happened. Okay, stop. Stop, stop, stop. Red stop sign. Alright, tell me who should get this book? Which is probably everybody, I know that\u2019s your answer. And what will it do for them? Sell me your book right now. I\u2019ve already bought it but sell other people your book.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Oh, my gosh. In thirty seconds. Well, and I wrote &#8211; just to clarify just for the sake of transparency, my practice is, I coach women. And I wrote this mostly for them. So, the examples in there are from women or people who identify as women. But I\u2019ve had a lot of men say, \u201cI\u2019ve read your book and I loved it. I got so much out of it.\u201d So, what they will stop doing is &#8211; I wrote about fourteen behaviors that are holding us back. So, it\u2019s self-sabotage. It\u2019s perfectionism. It\u2019s isolating and hiding out. It\u2019s numbing out, which I know just isn\u2019t a woman\u2019s issue, that\u2019s everybody. And it\u2019s also about over-achieving and blaming and things that I always say, \u201cThey work for a little while, until they don\u2019t anymore.\u201d So, if you\u2019re at that place where you\u2019re thinking, \u201cYeah, I don\u2019t think that that\u2019s actually working for me anymore,\u201d and that\u2019s where the title comes from. It\u2019s not for people who are walking around constantly feeling like shit. If that\u2019s you, you probably need a therapist. What it\u2019s for is, for people who are doing all of these behaviors because they worked for a while and they\u2019re getting to a place where it\u2019s starting to feel like shit and they don\u2019t know why it\u2019s not working anymore. And so, that\u2019s what I talk about. It\u2019s lots of tools in there for people to actually implement &#8211; action.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>And these &#8211; well, they\u2019re compensating behaviors, in reality. Coping mechanisms, yeah. And they are &#8211; it\u2019s so good. Like, every one of them I\u2019m like, \u201cOh, yeah. Oh, yeah.\u201d Really great list of this is the stuff that you use to feel better when you don\u2019t.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah. Well, no one teaches us coping mechanisms, right? That\u2019s not one of the electives when we\u2019re in high school. It should be but that\u2019s what I\u2019m teaching is better coping mechanisms, which would have been a really unsexy title for a book.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b><i>How to Stop Feeling Like Shit<\/i> is a way better title.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">It is. I\u2019m about to write my third book actually and so, for the rest of this year, I\u2019m only doing private clients. I\u2019m not doing any group programs or anything like that. So, yeah.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Great, and so we want people to go to <\/b><span class=\"s1\"><b>www.yourkickasslife.com<\/b><\/span><b> and they can find @yourkickasslife on Instagram.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">That\u2019s where I love to hang out. I do.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Yeah, and you have your own podcast.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">I do.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Yes. So, we\u2019ll link to that. All these things, we\u2019re going to link to. If you\u2019re on an iPhone you can just swipe up to check out the show notes or you can go to <\/b><span class=\"s1\"><b>www.insporising.com<\/b><\/span><b> and find all of these links in the show notes there. Or just go to yourkickasslife.com because that\u2019s where you\u2019re going to connect.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah, that\u2019s where everything is.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Yeah. Andrea, thank you.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">David, thank you.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Whoa, a previous &#8211; we talked about reincarnation.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">We have.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>I\u2019ve got to think about -. I have another friend who possibly believes in reincarnation. I don\u2019t know. I\u2019m open to believing in it. <\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>The tradition that I grew up definitely does not believe in it.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">I\u2019m not surprised.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>But yeah, yeah. I\u2019ll have to think about who -. Maybe I\u2019ll just make up who I was. I don\u2019t like your idea that I was having a lot of problems in the previous life. I would prefer that I was somebody noble and amazing in the previous life.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Sure.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Yeah, that would be way more fun to believe about myself. <\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Yeah, I was this lame person and now I\u2019m having the chance to be better. No, I\u2019d rather be someone awesome and somehow\u2026<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Of course.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>At the end of my life, I screwed up and I had to take some backtracks.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Yeah, and I mean, I don\u2019t know. If I had to stake my life on it, none of us actually know. That\u2019s why there\u2019s religion.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Oh, a lot of people know. A lot of people know. They\u2019re very strong in their knowing.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">No one really knows but it\u2019s just &#8211; it\u2019s something that I believe and it\u2019s -. I kind of feel like, whatever works for you and makes you show up as a great human being, then run with it.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>I bet you also use essential oils and stroke crystals too?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Oh, my God. Should I show you my crystals? They\u2019re back there. I have only seven and one of them was really expensive. It\u2019s kind of embarrassing. Well, it was like thirty dollars for a little rock.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>That\u2019s not expensive.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">No, compared to how much some of them are. I have essential oils. I don\u2019t use them on the regular. My son actually has a diffuser in his room. He loves them and he has crystals too.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>I just started using essential oils. I interviewed a woman named Lindsey Elmore, who\u2019s a famous essential oil guru and so she got me to sign up for Young Living and I\u2019m now &#8211; I\u2019ve got literally -. Like, here I\u2019ve got &#8211; my favorite\u2026<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">A kit?<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Is peppermint.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">They are pretty amazing.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Yeah, I put it in my eyes for eye drops. It feels good.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">You do not! I almost believed you for like a half a second. I was like, \u201cHow do not know about this?\u201d No, but I have sensory issues. So does my son. And smells, I can\u2019t do those plug-in scents. Cannot &#8211; they make my body hurt. Even incense &#8211; I couldn\u2019t even deal with incense anymore and so the diffuser with the essential oils is the only thing I can do as air fresheners. There are some candles that work for me but not a lot.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>But crystals, because they don\u2019t smell. So, that\u2019s nice.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">They don\u2019t smell and you can wear them in your bra. No, I don\u2019t. I know people that do.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Are you kidding me?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">They make bras that specifically have pockets for holding your crystals.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>That\u2019s like a third nipple. In the middle or something?<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">No, it\u2019s probably &#8211; actually, I don\u2019t know. It\u2019s probably somewhere in the middle where it doesn\u2019t show as much. But they make flat crystals too. You could get a nice rose quartz.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>I have not had someone on the podcast that focuses on crystals yet. That is going to be\u2026<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Oh, God. There\u2019s this woman\u2026<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>I\u2019ve got to get\u2026<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">And now I can\u2019t remember her name. God, she\u2019s like &#8211; she\u2019s a little bit reminiscent of Cardi B and she has this thick Brooklyn accent. Yes, exactly and she is all into crystals. I\u2019ll have to send it to you but she would be amazing to have on your podcast.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Okay, find her. Let\u2019s get her on. <\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Okay.<\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\"><b>Andrea, thank you for being with us today.<\/b><\/p>\r\n<p class=\"p1\">Thank you so much, David. It\u2019s been my pleasure and I\u2019m honored to have been the first guest where you said your first curse word. I feel like it\u2019s brought our friendship to the next level.<\/p>\r\n<p><!-- \/wp:paragraph -->\r\n\r\n<!-- wp:separator {\"className\":\"is-style-wide\"} --><\/p>\r\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator is-style-wide\" \/>\r\n<p><!-- \/wp:separator -->\r\n\r\n<!-- wp:paragraph --> <strong>Subscribe to Inspiration Rising<\/strong> on <a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/inspiration-rising\/id1448649388\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Apple Podcasts<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/play.google.com\/music\/m\/Iqrp5q3bagph2t23malprd3dxvy?t=Launch_Yourself_Today\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Google Podcasts,<\/a>\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/42zIsXzjCibZt49xdCRvB4\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Spotify<\/a>, or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.stitcher.com\/podcast\/in-plain-sight\/launch-yourself-today\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Stitcher.<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Andrea Owen is an author, mentor, and professional certified life coach who helps high-achieving women let go of perfectionism, control, and isolation and choosing courage and confidence instead. She has helped thousands of women manage their inner-critic to create loving connections and live their most kick-ass life. She is the proud author of How To [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7095,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[49],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7092","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-podcast"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7092","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7092"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7092\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/7095"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7092"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7092"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/insporising.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7092"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}